Forgive Me for I Am Old

I am self employed, meaning that I’m either working long hours or am sitting at home doing nothing. The problem with having a job that comes and goes is you are often left in the position of having a bank account full of money and a mountain of household chores to do. This can lead a person to surf Amazon.com, where she will rationalize that if she buys this cool new mop, mopping the floors will suddenly become a SUPER FUN activity, and the problem of avoiding household chores will be solved. You will have a clean home and never be bored. This scenario is of course just about as likely winning the lottery without ever buying a ticket.

Nonetheless, it was this exact series of events that led me to be excited when I received an email from Amazon that said “Your mop has shipped!” Yes indeed, I am excited about a new mop, which means I am both lame and old. I cannot decide if it would be worse for this mop  to arrive and either A) I  do not fall head over heels in love with mopping as I hoped, or B) that I will in fact think mopping is the greatest activity on the earth, meaning I should just throw out all my clothes that aren’t sweat pants since any hope of having a life will be gone at that point.

PS – I contemplated having a lame-a-thon of Facebook statues, but I worried I would lose some friends in the process. The sad thing is, I actually know people that post things like this:

“My new mop just came in! So excited!!!$%@!”

“Just took my new mop out for a “test drive” haha. My floors are soooo shiny!”

“Anyone want to come over and watch Dr. Phil in my new clean house??”

If I still have readers after this post, I will update you on the mop when it *gasp* arrives. Stay tuned…for more tales from a part-time housewife.

You Might Also Like:

2 Thoughts on “Forgive Me for I Am Old

  1. Mary on September 15, 2011 at said:

    Hey, you can talk about your new mop as much as you like. You can even come try it out on my floors when you get it.

  2. Tere Payne on September 16, 2011 at said:

    You are toooo funny!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Post Navigation